MULTIPLE JOKES

Some Laughter=D =)) ***Q: Why are condoms transparent?A: So that sperms can at least enjoy the scene even if their entry is Restricted!(y) ***Signboard outside a prostitute's house: Married MEN not allowed. We serve the needy, not the greedy...(n) ***New AIDS awareness slogan: Try different positions with the same woman instead of same position with different women.:D ***Why is $ex like shaving?Well, because no matter how well you do it today... tomorrow you'll  have to do it again.../:). ***Q: What will happen if earth rotates 30 times faster?A: Men will get their salary everyday and women will bleed to death.#:-s ***Q: Why do 90% gals have left boob bigger than right?A: Bcoz 90% boys are right handed.:x ***Q: What is the difference between a PANTY & a STAGE CURTAIN?A: When you pull down the STAGE CURTAIN, the show is over, but when you pull down the PANTY..... it is SHOWTIME!X_X ***Q: What is the similarity between a wife and a chewing gum?A: Both are sweet in the beginning but become tasteless and shapeless later.=)) ***Advantages of having an affair with a married women. They give like hell. They do not yell. They do not tell. They do not swell and there is no wedding bell!;) ***My dad told me that if Adam and Eve were Chinese, we would be still in Paradise . Why? Because they would have eaten the snake instead of the bloody apple! =D =))

WHO'S YOUR DADDY

My girlfriend recently found out she was adopted. She was devastated... kept crying and asking why they did not want her. I cuddled her a bit. She then asked me to make love to her... I did so and the tear's began to flow even more. I suppose shagging her and shouting who's your daddy might have been a bit insensitive...=))

learn chinese in 5 minutes

LEARN CHINESE IN 5 MINUTES
(You MUST read them out loud or it doesnt make as much sense)...
1) Thats not right........ Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive................... Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP............. Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man...................... Dum Fuk
5) Small horse... Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the beach?... Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped in to a coffee table... Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
8) I think you need a face lift... Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here... Wao So Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet... Wai Yu Mun Ching
11) This is a tow away zone... No Pah King
12) staying out of sight... Lei Ying Lo
13) He's cleaning his automobile... Wa Shing Ka
14) Your body odor is offensive... Yu Stin Ki Pu
15) Great... Fa Kin Su Pah

MALEMA

Malema at an art gallery:- I suppose this horrible looking thing is what u white people call modern art??? Art dealer:- I beg your pardon Sir, that's. a mirror.... 

SOLDIERS OF WAR

A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, 'Please, may I hide under your skirt. I'll explain later.'The nun agreed. A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, Sister, have you seen a soldier?'The nun replied, 'He went that way.'After the MP's ran off, the soldiercrawled out from under her skirt and said, 'I can't thank you enoughSister You see, I don't want to go to Iraq .'The nun said, 'I understand completely.'The soldier added, 'I hope I'm not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!'The nun replied, 'If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls....I don't want to go to Iraq either !!!

THE PERFECT GIRL

rQualities that a man looks for in a perfect girlfriend
•Truthful
•Intelligent
•Gentle
•Humble
•Tolerant
•Polite
•Understanding
•Sexy
•Smart
•Youthful
In short: T.I.G.H.T.P.U.S.S.Y.

Don't shoot me its jus d truth ryt guys, send 2 all men 2 make dem laugh & any chicks with a good sense of humour